Payback is a Bitch


Payback is a BitchHow many times have we heard someone say payback is a bitch or what goes around comes around? When someone slights us we get angry and plot revenge.  At least we have momentary thoughts of it.  Well, I’m talking for Skippy and me.  We actually have long discussions about how heartless we could be.  ‘I’m the nicest person in the world until you cross me!’  For some reason vocalising revenge actually releases some of the tension pent up from whatever horrible event that was thrown at us.  (Believe me, there have been many.) Oddly, every time we have a discussion like this we end up in fits of laughter.  Probably because neither of us takes each other seriously.  We know we are too happy to be out there trying to run people over with our cars or take them out on long fishing trips where we come back with a big catch and nobody else. (Although the thought of this also makes me laugh!)

The reality of payback is that exacting revenge on someone brings negativity right back into your life.  Given the chance to do something to someone after they have done something to you; what would you choose to do?  Initially it might feel great to  deliver swift and furious payback.  You can imagine the persons face as they realise this is the same thing they did to you.  The thought might sound appealing especially if you still are carrying around the hurt from the first painful event. But if you are like me, you risk feeling guilt afterwards.  We can rationalise that the person deserved it.  But in our hearts we know it is wrong.  We know because we felt the pain from it too.  Guilt is not something I want to be carrying around.  Payback is a bitch.  But perhaps the saying is meant to warn the person plotting revenge.  Or perhaps warn both parties.  No good can come out of evil deeds.

I had the most amazing opportunity for payback today.  I didn’t even second guess myself when instead I leant the person a hand.  I would like to say it’s not in my nature but I believe we all have a dark side.  The difference may be that I have learned to love myself.  I love myself too much to bring more negativity into my life.  I try to approach all situations with a loving heart.  No doubt I fail at times.  But I choose happiness in my life.  I can’t really commit to that if I am exacting revenge on the people who have hurt me.  (Not to mention this would be a full time job.)

I do believe that payback is a bitch.  I do believe that what goes around comes around.  Therefore, I don’t have time for bitches in my life and if I’m kind to people, I believe that kindness will be returned.

Peace and Love. 🙂


The Bet….One of Many


In Bermuda, we don’t have legalised gaming.  There are no casinos.  The government was supposed to have a referendum on gaming but alas that is a whole other story.  This however, does not deter folks from making the occasional bet between friends.  And by occasional, I mean daily.  Granted all bets are not for money but nevertheless, they are frequent and exciting!  In December, I placed a bet with an esteemed colleague.  This was no sporting event. We had an argument over whether or not children were invited to a corporate shopping event we attended.  It shouldn’t have mattered to us whatsoever as neither of us had our children with us.  Being the bullheaded, hot blooded, I’m always right, portagee that I am, I put money on it.  (Portagee is a nickname used for Portuguese.  This is apparently offensive to some but where I am from we use it as a friendly term)  $50 to be exact.  My coworker also has hot blood and readily agreed as he was ‘almost 110% positive’ that he was right. We would have to wait until morning to check our emails at work to find out who the winner was.  At the end of the night, we parted ways and I yelled back to him that I would like my money in small bills.  

So said, so done.  I won the bet.  Naturally or I would never have posted my loss!  My colleague paid me in full fashion with a plastic bag of $50 in pure change.  The change bag still sits on my kitchen counter and is now passing hands as everyone seems willing to win or lose the $50 in change.  More bets ensued. The money changed hands but is back in my possession.

Skippy in a moment which can only be described as crazed disillusionment, has bet me $50 that he could read Malcolm Gladwell’s ‘What the Dog Saw’ before I could complete reading Rhonda Byrne’s ‘The Hero’.  Our deadline is on Sunday.  I not only completed ‘The Hero’ but I also completed Malcolm Gladwell’s ‘David and Goliath’. (Excellent by the way)  I warned Skippy today of his impending loss.  He didn’t exactly deny it but did have a lot of excuses.  I hope he comments on this because he swears down that he never makes excuses. I am looking for something else to read and smiling because soon I will have $100 sitting on my kitchen counter peacefully awaiting the next bet.  Who needs gaming?  Forget casinos!  I have enough change on the counter to feel like I hit it big at a slot machine!Image

My Bologna Has a First Name…


Disclaimer: Skippy and I are new at this blogging thing.  Our posts are not meant to offend anyone although at some point they invariably will.  And…we will most likely find it funny.  We are serious about a lot of things in life.  For example, wait now, give me a minute.  I’m sure I will think of something.  I’ll get back to that when I come up with something believable.

This is our first post of the year.  Duh.  Like you didn’t know that.  We are not gonna talk any of that new year, new me, new resolutions, crap.  We are headstrong, stubborn and stuck in our ways….trust me on this!  But we are happy, funny, silly, rude and a lot childish.  We are bonafides and when life gets us down, we choose to laugh through the pain.  Katt Williams talks about getting your seven laughs.  Mostly I’ve had seven laughs before I brush my teeth in the morning.  Life is just too hilarious not to.

I don’t know where our nicknames came from.  I’ve never even seen Skippy eat peanut butter.  I have been trying to convert him from a life of supposed healthy eating to a much more rigorous diet of bologna and bacon.  Okay well that certainly explains my nickname.  I think I just like calling him Skippy because I really love peanut butter.  Wow.  This is an eye opener.  I guess it’s a term of endearment.  Nah…it can’t be that.  It probably just started because I was hungry.  Yup that’s got to be it.

This year we are documenting our crazy, funny life.  Mostly so we can go back and laugh at it all.  Hopefully we can make other people laugh too.